Just for today…
Can you remember what you wanted to be when you grew up? Was there more than one thing? How did those stories end up for you? Did you dabble in any of them once you were old enough? Did you pursue that path only to discover you were lead in a different direction? Or did you move completely on from the idea? How do you feel about those sentiments you felt as a child today? And what about more recently – what things do you really want for yourself, to be, do, or have? What are you doing? Being?
I recall wanting to be a hairdresser and an air force pilot when I was a kid, and throughout my life I have been, and attempted to be many things; An artist, a writer (blogger!), a foodie, an adult, a party animal, a health nut, a fitness fanatic, a drinker, a non-drinker, a student, a teacher, a therapist, organic, a guitar player, the list goes on. Some of those goals were long term goals, and some of them more in the immediate. Even though I am a firm believer in goal setting as it is definitely the best way to organise your energy and move in the right direction, today I’m talking about setting a goal of a different kind, a goal that can run through any and all other goals, to be maintained when life gets in the way of our other goals. Because life has a tendency to do that, especially when you start expanding and you perhaps start a new job, your own business, a new relationship, renovate, relocate, or (probably life’s biggest curve ball in my experience 🙂 become a parent.
The goals we set generally come from a desire, a calling, an inspiration, or out of experiencing the contrast or opposite, like perhaps the desire to be a health nut came out of an unhealthy weekend or the desire to be a foodie came out of getting bored of meat & 3 veg! Some of my ideas have gone by the wayside and thankfully these days through factoring in this new goal I am able to be “indifferent” when I need to be about them. But if you had asked me a few years ago the story may have been different. I may have whinged to you about how slack I am at keeping up with regimes, how “bad” I am for not being able to stick to anything, how I’ve NEVER been able to complete things I start. How “good” I was when I was doing it and how I wish I could be that person again, because that person was SO much better than the person I am today (and healthier and fitter and more resilient blah blah blah…). Does this sound familiar?
So from that I wondered this; What if we just allowed ourselves to set the goal of being whatever it is we are being today? Right now? In this moment right here? Whatever that may be. What if just for today you are healthy? What if today you don’t drink? What if today you are a writer (blogger!). What if today you exercise? What if today you (insert own lifestyle desire here) …………?
I have found through having this as my go-to goal on busy days that I am able to maintain my other goals a lot better. On those days when life takes priority over my own personal goals, like the needs of my kids, shift-working husband, my own work, or social engagements, rather than buying into the story of being any sort of failure, I just simply wasn’t being that for that day, but who knows what the next day held? What I discovered was that I was more able to relax and enjoy life, to take it as it comes, to make the most of opportunities, and when time became available to do some exercise or plan a healthy weekly menu I was able to be more present with that opportunity, and make the most of it, instead of wallowing in the aforementioned self-pity.
A basic mechanism of the subconscious is to “run stories”, the quality of these stories will depend on many things such as earlier life experiences, things we see in the media, and things that have or haven’t worked for us in the past. When you awaken to this mechanism in your own experience you begin to realise you can feed it any story you like that will support your goals. Sometimes we run scare tactic stories (like fears for our health) or self-abuse stories (like being a failure) in order to keep ourselves in line. I have discovered through many years of observing this within myself and discussing it with others that it’s actually when we are kinder to ourselves and connect to a higher purpose through enjoying whatever it is we are doing that we have any real chance to stick to anything, or for it to make a difference in our lives. For example if the desire is to be healthy, then it’s through enjoying the feeling of being healthy that we will return more easily to our health goals. And a powerful place to start is by allowing any or all of your goals to be “just for today” because somehow in that day, with the pressure released, and the stories re-directed we are able to discover the joy in the things that we really do want for ourselves, and enjoying our lives is after all the ultimate goal.
